3 underrated turns of phrase from SF Giants broadcaster Mike Krukow that will be sorely missed

Beloved SF Giants broadcaster Mike Krukow is set to retire after Sunday’s game against the Los Angeles Dodgers. While it still doesn’t quite feel real that he’s going to be stepping away and the fact that Duane Kuiper was diagnosed with throat cancer just makes it all even feel more surreal, we have to appreciate all the Krukow we get this weekend.

A lot has been made about Krukisms, or sayings that Kruk has either come up with or popularized over the years in the broadcast booth. The classics are obviously “Grab some pine, meat,” or, “Gamer babes,” or, “In the squaaaat,” but there are some more underrated ones that deserve love too. I’ll highlight three that have always brought a smile to my face over the years.

3 Mike Krukow sayings that deserve more love

“Aztec two-step”

Krukow didn’t break this one out often, but if a batter either got hit by a pitch or got backed off the plate with a fastball up and in, you could bet he was going to do the “Aztec two-step” either out of pain or to get out of the way.

It’s such an interesting phrase and as a San Diego State alum, I feel that whenever I dance (which is not often) I have to do some sort of interpretation of the Aztec two-step.

In researching this phrase, it turns out that there’s actually a folk-rock band from the 1970s called Aztec Two-Step. Perhaps Kruk pays homage to them every time he drops the phrase. 

Apparently it is also a synonym for “Montezuma’s revenge” so Kruk is basically saying that batters are so afraid of a fastball up and in or are in so much pain from getting hit that they may lose control of their bodily functions.

“Best changeup we’ve seen all year”

Krukow dropped this one whenever an outfielder would make an especially awful or weak throw when trying to throw a runner out at home. 

I can’t find any video of it, but the one example I think of with this phrase happened probably about a decade ago when Khris Davis, who had a ton of power at the plate but also had an absolute noodle for an arm in left field, just completely spiked a throw no more than 15 feet in front of himself as he tried to throw a runner out at home.

When they showed the replay Krukow goes, “And Khris Davis with the best changeup we’ve seen all year.” Just absolute gold.

“Wild hair up his nose”

Kruk reserved this one for particularly erratic pitchers who can easily lose their command on the mound. Usually it’s relievers like Camilo Doval or Santiago Casilla who I think of being associated with the phrase and whenever Kruk says it, it reminds me to shave my nose hairs. Not only does it make me laugh but it forces me to groom myself. Funny and useful!

There are so many other ones to pick from and Grant Brisbee has a great piece from years ago that has a lot of them listed, but everyone has their own favorite Krukisms which will live with us forever even though Krukow will be calling his final game on Sunday.

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