SF Giants News

Oakland A’s Fan Wants To Fight Brian Wilson

By Bryan Rose
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When Brian Wilson isn’t doing his awesome yet kept extremely quiet charity work, filming himself doing questionable things on U-Stream, fornicating with hookers in Thailand, or dressing up as Sponge Bob’s sidekick, he’s apparently pissing off Oakland A’s fans.

I bring you IwannafightBrianWilson.com

No, I’m serious.

Wilson, teh Jesus that he is, apparently enraged tough guy A’s fan so much that he now wants to fornicate destroy Brian Wilson and his beard. I’d try to explain the whole situation to you, but, clearly – I couldn’t give this debacle it’s full credit. And, well, I can actually communicate in proper English, so I’m void from putting my footprint on this…

"On May 23, 2010 I attended the Oakland A’s vs San Francisco Giants baseball game with my family. It was the third game of the three game series with the A’s up 2-0 in the series. The A’s were going for the sweep, so I brought my broom with me. Our seats were about three rows up from the Giants bullpen. Before the game started Brian Wilson walked up infront of our area and gave some giants fans some autographs, so I asked him if he could sign my broom “Cool Guy” since he thinks he’s such a cool guy. I guess he picked up on my sarcasm and just looked at me with a get lost face. I continued to ask him to sign my broom “Cool Guy” so he moved over a little to square up with me and asked me, “Are YOU making fun of ME”?  After I laughed, I said “wow not just cool, you’re smart too”. So at this point he got all heated up and said, “Who the hell are you?!”, and challenged me to come on the field. I just responded by laughing and saying “look at you a professional athlete letting some Joe Shmoe get under your skin”. He just continued to challenge me to come down there and fight him. Of course Im not going to go down onto a professional baseball field to fight a player, Im not an idiot. He continued to get mad as i just laughed at him, to the point that his bullpen coach had to pull him away and push him all the way into right field as he yelled and cursed at me."

YEA! YEA COOL GUY! SIGN MY BROOM!!! PUT IT IN MY BUTT! HOT TEXAS IN A CORNFIELD.

Seriously though, it’s one thing to heckle a player – but it’s a completely different thing to present yourself as a Captain Douchebag. And clearly, this guy floats the fleet.

Tally ho, motherfucker.

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